On Sunday, the 31-year-old shared a post after attending church with her actor husband, revealing that she has been working on letting herself feel the heartache of losing her daughter without letting it shut her off “to the things that can bring you joy too.”
“After tragedy or heartache it can be tempting to shut down so you don’t feel pain. Aka survival mode. But when you shut yourself off to pain, you also shut yourself off to the things that can bring you joy too,” she wrote in a lengthy note on Instagram. “I’ve done that in the past. More than once. I can tell you from experience it takes a LOT of work to soften your heart after you’ve let it go hard.”
“Throughout the last two weeks I’ve worked SO hard to remain soft,” Gonzales continued. “As much as I’m tired of falling apart, and want to be done finding myself crying in a ball on the floor, if I allowed myself to fall into the temptation to shut down, I know I’d be missing those special moments that have made me smile and laugh and feel happy again.”
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One of those special moments occurred on Sunday, as the couple was walking home after church.
Gonzales first opened up about the loss earlier this month, sharing a black-and-white photo of herself on Instagram and writing an emotional farewell letter to her unborn daughter.
She later thanked her fans in a subsequent post for their messages of support and encouragement through this difficult time.
Kellan Lutz and Brittany Gonzales.David Livingston/Getty Images
Lutz also opened up about the loss, praising his wife’s strength and calling her “my wonder woman.”
“It’s beena crazy rollercoaster of a weekwith a lot of emotions,” the formerTwilightstar wrote. “Taking heartbrokenness to a whole new level, but grateful for these past 6 months and the journey itself. In life we might not get the answers to all of our questions but we will always remain faithful!”
The actor continued, “I love you @brittanylynnlutz. Thank you for all your love, respect in this private time, understanding of this situation, and utmost support. Just know we love you all and appreciate you all and we process all differently.”
source: people.com
